Drive another day

The name’s Blonde - Strawberry Blonde! I’ll have a beer not shaken or stirred, just a slice of lime please. And my mission, since I have no choice but to accept it is: observation studies on gender differences to conformity at traffic signals*.

Having donned a suitable disguise of blue jeans, trainers and a sweatshirt I position myself in an inconspicuous position near the target, being sure to have a good line of sight and a clear escape route. Once comfortable I check the time on my very low tech watch and wait.

Five minutes pass and I’m about to abort the mission when a figure passes me and approaches the target. “Go on” I whisper under my breath “Push the button – I dare you!” The figure scans the horizon and begins to raise a finger to the button. Time appears to go into slow motion, as I reach for my pocket and grab my weapon and the lights change from green to amber to red…

Man…no, man…no, woman yes

Time races back into real time as I raise my head from the note pad, and blow the steam of my pen. The figure has now crossed the road I whisper “Thanks” as I smile at them walking away unknowingly down the street.

Before I could replace the pen back into my pocket another figure approaches the lights. “Yes” I whisper again trying not to get too excited and give my mission away. Again they scan the horizon and as I prepare myself for another frantic observation he steps out and trots across the road.

“NO!” I gasp “How could you – bloody sod!” I continue to mutter quietly in disgrace at the stranger across the street.

Another five minutes and nine victims later, I look and my watch, close my notepad, place the pen back in my pocket and breath a satisfied sigh.

Mission Complete, now to get this information back to Mrs Psychology.

*Anyone who is studying Psychology at college will now groan at the sounds of that mission.