OK its 7:30pm, the girls are tucked up in bed and you feel like a good long No.2 with a magazine or good book. You get comfortable on the throne, open your page and…knock, knock, knock goes the door…Oh great!
A few questions pass through my mind quickly – Who could that be? Should I ignore it? What if it’s important? Why now…at this very moment!? Another knock at the door gets me up from the seat, clean up quickly and rush downstairs now thinking “Oh god whoever it is will have just heard the toilet flushing and with my stuffy nose I don’t know if any smells are lingering either. As I walk briskly through the kitchen I also notice the mess of supper dishes that I was going to clear once I had relieved myself….great now they are going to think I’m a pig too!
Maybe I shouldn’t answer the door, but there’s no curtains on the kitchen window and there’s a chance they might have seen me approaching, if not then they surely would have heard me and possibly even smelt me (by which I mean my brain with all the hard thinking I’ve been doing in the last minute!)
So there’s no choice I open the door to a young lady with a blue RSPCA vest on, 15 minutes later I’m holding a thank you for joining pack and showing Laura (having been formally introduced for the paperwork) to the door. Just before she leaves she asks to borrow the toilet…much to my dismay I politely say “no worries” and escort her upstairs to the bathroom where I’m hoping to god there’s no smell in there or worse I haven’t left any skidders, since I didn’t have time to look back earlier.
She didn’t mention anything – maybe because she could see how tense I had suddenly become and that I was turning a nice shade of red - but thanked me for my time and was on her way into the darkness.
I loitered in the lounge for a while until I was completely confident she had gone then dashed upstairs to finish what I had started half an hour ago!
A few questions pass through my mind quickly – Who could that be? Should I ignore it? What if it’s important? Why now…at this very moment!? Another knock at the door gets me up from the seat, clean up quickly and rush downstairs now thinking “Oh god whoever it is will have just heard the toilet flushing and with my stuffy nose I don’t know if any smells are lingering either. As I walk briskly through the kitchen I also notice the mess of supper dishes that I was going to clear once I had relieved myself….great now they are going to think I’m a pig too!
Maybe I shouldn’t answer the door, but there’s no curtains on the kitchen window and there’s a chance they might have seen me approaching, if not then they surely would have heard me and possibly even smelt me (by which I mean my brain with all the hard thinking I’ve been doing in the last minute!)
So there’s no choice I open the door to a young lady with a blue RSPCA vest on, 15 minutes later I’m holding a thank you for joining pack and showing Laura (having been formally introduced for the paperwork) to the door. Just before she leaves she asks to borrow the toilet…much to my dismay I politely say “no worries” and escort her upstairs to the bathroom where I’m hoping to god there’s no smell in there or worse I haven’t left any skidders, since I didn’t have time to look back earlier.
She didn’t mention anything – maybe because she could see how tense I had suddenly become and that I was turning a nice shade of red - but thanked me for my time and was on her way into the darkness.
I loitered in the lounge for a while until I was completely confident she had gone then dashed upstairs to finish what I had started half an hour ago!
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